Saturday 26 December 2015

H E L P!!!

This has gone beyond bad...
My health is in a terrible state, my body is falling to bits.. 
I now have;
Arterial filberation
Oesto arthritis in knees, hands, wrists
Diverticulitis 

I'm at the state where I don't even look at myself in mirrors anymore... my body disgusts me, let alone anybody that has the misfortune of looking at me! (A think my ex taught me!).
The more I loath myself and tell my self off about the weight gain, the more I eat junk food.
One of the big problems also is the fact that I'm in full time work (a job that I love) and am knackered when I get home (probs because of all the excess weight I'm lugging around) so don't stand around chopping vegetables etc...

Thursday 16 July 2015

Ugh!

It just keeps getting worse!
I REALLY NEED TO PULL MYSELF TOGETHER, GET A GRIP AND SORT MYSELF OUT!!!!!
This continuous weight gaining is not good!  Not only is it wrecking any chance of recovery for my knees, it's costing me a fortune in Gaviscon as all this crap food I'm eating is playing havoc with my insides.. So, I think, fingers crossed, that tonight, I might join good ole SW again but at another group! Of course I know damn well if anything resembling an excuse turns up I will grab it with greasy fingers and not go!!!

My sore knee's really getting me down, and, because I'm relying on a crutch too, my neck and shoulder are suffering! My legs are very swollen and bulbus and my clothes look AWFUL, that's mainly because I got rid of my larger sizes when I lost the three stone I've now put back on!! The result of all this is me not wanting to be seen in public!!!

Ho hum
Happy Days!


Tuesday 16 June 2015

Ugh!

Well, this is still my view!

I had to cancel my Physio appointment today, which I REALLY need,  as I still can't be away from the loo!!!  It's a pain because my leg is uncomfortable atm, and I need to get the Physio people to check it out!  Ho hum!!! 
No work either! 

Roll on feeling better!

Happy days! Xx


Monday 15 June 2015

Ok! What now?

Well......
Not content with the uncomfortable tummy, the weight gain, the leg damage, the unhappiness.... Life's thrown me another lemon!!!
Major stomach cramps and diarrhoea!  
Day two now ... My bum's so painful :-( 

Ho hum!  Happy Days. Xxxxxx

Thursday 11 June 2015

A black day...

....for me today... For not only am I still looking at this view ..


But this morning I hit another stone zone in the wrong direction!!!!!
I haven't been this weight since my third weigh in at SW on the 23/1/2012!!!!
So, on the whole leg/ knee thing, I'm still very uncomfortable and no further on than I was three weeks ago .. In fact I'm pretty sure the calf has got worse!
The knee still hurts and I can't fully extend my leg without it feeling like it's going to snap! Therefore whenever possible I keep the leg elevated ... I presume it helps with the swelling, though one wouldn't think so if they looked at it!
I just love sporting crutches .. I always think they look so cool! NOT!!!!

Now, on the weight front I was devastated this morning ... Really couldn't believe it!
I can only put some of the gains down to my lack of movement, the rest is down to my spiral of unhappiness ... I gain weight, I hurt, I hate myself, I eat! I gain weight, I hate myself, I eat! I hurt, I eat, I'm unhappy, I eat .. You get the drift!
Back to Physio next week .. See what they have to say ...

Ugh! I hate me!



Saturday 25 April 2015

Still not there ....

...... yet!

Feeling really down and hating myself massively atm.
Just keep on gaining ..
Everything hurts! My knees, my back, my arms, my feelings ... all gone to pot!
Let's hope I can climb out of this pit of unhappiness real soon!

xxx

Thursday 2 April 2015

Ok ok

... So it's not all going as planned,  ... this week I've gained 2lbs!😞.
I can't get into the swing of it all and I've also climbed into a higher stone zone, which doesn't help my mood!!!!
Hopefully, maybe, perhaps after Easter I'll click into gear again?!?!?! 


Thursday 19 March 2015

Well, not bad!

Shed 1lb this week... Not bad, but could be loads better!!!!
Cooked some SW scones and weetabix muffins today.. Had the scones along with homemade chicken soup using our left over roast chicken from last night!

Happy days!  Xx

Friday 13 March 2015

Sad!

I am feeling down in the dumps...

After a long chat with hubby we decided to give up Slimming World.. We were paying £100 every twelve weeks, and we weren't geting support from our leader.  How do we know this! Well, before we moved to this group we had a fab group where the leader was the most supportive, encouraging, caring, motivational person ever.... She cared for us as a person, felt our sadness, rejoiced in our happiness, supported our individual journeys ... I lost a lot of weight with her and in July.. Moved to this group... Here's my progress since July!



A long, slow, uphill gain!  
NOT GOOD!

So, we're going to see if we can do it on our own!   We both know what we should be doing. Bathroom scales have been purchased and a weight chart duly printed!  I really hope we can do this!

Chat soon!

Thursday 15 January 2015

OK .. so there you have it!

I had a gain of 3.5lbs!!!!!!

Too unhappy and uncomfortable to stay to group!  What a mess!!!

A wedding and two birthdays these next two weeks too!

Ho hum!

xxxx

So ...

.. today I am suffering for my terrible choices I made yesterday!
I went to the health food shop to get my golden linseed, after work, while hungry! Not my best move!
5 minutes later I came out with said linseed, peanuts and raisins in chocolate and a mix they call Roulette! Again, another bad move on my part!
I got home and then, wait for it, proceeded to eat my way through, not only one, but, each of the bags of mixed nuts! Really bad move!
Today, my sad, diverticulitis riddled gut is SORE!  All my own doing!!!!
Goodness only knows how many syns I consumed!!!

Today I'm drinking lemon water and feeling not only sorry for myself, but really really annoyed with myself and stupid!!!!

Ho hum!


Tuesday 13 January 2015

What kind of eater am I???

.. An emotional one!
No surprises there then ...
I know, for sure, I turn to food whenever I'm sad, lonely, stressed .. you name it, I feel it therefore I eat!!!!
I took the BBC test after watching the programme they put on because this week is obesity awareness week!

This week has been pretty stressful I must say .. goodness only knows what the scales will reveal!!!

Happy days! x

Saturday 3 January 2015

Today proved a point ...

... planning is key to eating healthy!
We ended up going out to Van Hague in Peterborough ... I didn't have a decent breakfast, needed to eat, ended up eating junk and buying even more junk!
Two things, eat a proper breakfast and don't buy food when hungry as you end up with junk!
Lesson learnt ... again!
Enough said!

Friday 2 January 2015

Urgh!!!!

Well having spent most of Christmas downing Gaviscon I'm glad to say I feel better being back on plan!!! It's taken a lot for me to realise that eating rich food is not good for my stomach!!!!
Cream, chocolate, butter, wine & cheese seem to be the main culprits, and to be honest, they are not SW friendly!!!!!
So, roll on Thursday, and my fist weight loss of 2015!
Happy New Year!
Xx